Archives for December 2012

Countdown to Christmas: Day 24

Welp, it’s the night before Christmas, and all through the house…

Not a creature is stirring…

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The stockings are hung by the chimney (and door) with care (Grandma has so many stockings!)…

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I’m worn out from traveling 550 miles in two days and visiting with Mimi and Pawpaw, so I’m about to be nestled all snug in my bed…

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Mommy doesn’t own a ‘kerchief’. Klaus is back at the North Pole. The presents are wrapped. Santa’s been visited…

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Reindeer have been petted…

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Cookies have been decorated…

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Treats have been left for Santa (kind of)…

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All that’s left to do is say,

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Countdown to Christmas: Day 23

Elf on the Shelf

I taught Klaus how to do my favorite chore–clean the lint trap! Ok, maybe it’s not my favorite, but top 5.  Klaus had to get all of his laundry done because we have to drive him back to the airport tomorrow.  He has to be back in time to help Santa with Christmas deliveries!

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Advent Calendar Book

Aww, man.  It’s still not a Christmas book.  BUT, it’s about a doggy, so that’s cool.  I was so excited about my present that I didn’t even let Mommy get it all the way out of the present drawer…yes, from henceforth, this shall be called the present drawer.

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Family Photo FAIL

And, for some behind the scenes bribery…candy and Gatorade!

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**Don’t worry, I don’t actually drink Gatorade; I just like to put the lid on and off.

Countdown to Christmas: Day 22

Elf othe Shelf

Yes, yes, Klaus! We do organize my new toys from Uncle Jason and Aunt Kristin! That’s the spirit. Keep up the good work, little buddy.

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Advent Calendar Book

Yay!!! Two presents tonight.  I’m really practicing for Christmas Day! So exciting, yet so sad neither of them are Christmas themed…bottom of the barrel, eh Mom?

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Family Photo FAIL

Oh, man. Grown-up kisses. I’m outty, clowns.

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Countdown to Christmas: Day 21

Welp, we’re still here and didn’t die in an apocalyptic demise of the world. So we decided to continue on with our Christmas travels.  Klaus came.  I called dibs on Mommy’s bed.  She’s soft and snuggly and smells like milk and cookies.  Klaus gets Daddy.  He snores and smells like coffee (that might have something to do with the two shots of expresso he had while driving us).

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Whoops. Mommy forgot to pack the books.  Just more presents to open when we get home!  And we don’t have access to our FAIL pictures.  So here’s a cute picture of me just because.

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Getting ready to go swimmy!

Countdown to Christmas: Day 21

Elf on the Shelf

Hehehe.  No, no, Klaus.  We don’t gamble. Ok, Daddy likes to.  He never wins.  Mommy doesn’t like to.  She always wins.

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Advent Calendar Book

Interactive and shiny. YES!

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Family Photo FAIL

Ahhhh. It’s Sasquatch.  I’ll smile, I promise. I’ll smiiiile. Heeeeelp.

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Countdown to Christmas: Day 19

Elf on the Shelf

Haha, Klaus.  You only wish you had mad skillz like me (and Daddy).  Fool can’t even dunk.

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Advent Calendar Book

Ooh, Dickens.  I’m so advanced.  I got to open my present early in the day because we gave my babysitter and her baby a present.  Then I made her read it to me 10 times.  Then Mommy had to read it to me 10 times.  Then Daddy had to read it to me 10 times.

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Family Photo FAIL

Wait. Santa comes down the chimney? Bwhahaha.  That fat guy? Never going to fit.  You hear that Santa? Not going to fit.  Please be sure to leave your keys in the sleigh.  I’ll finish your route for ya.

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Countdown to Christmas: Day 18

Elf on the Shelf

No, no, Klaus! It’s not as fun as it looks. I promise. I’ve tried.

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Advent Calendar Book

Mommy took my present to Panera where we met Auntie Angela and Kat for dinner. I don’t know what this book is.  I don’t know what dinner was.  I pretended to be super-duper tornado Matty. Whirr whirr.  Apparently we’re back to not going out to eat again for awhile.  Whatever.  P.S. Mommy says this is a pretty accurate depiction of dining with kids.

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Family Photo FAIL

It’s a redneck Christmas, ya’ll.

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Countdown to Christmas: Day 17

Elf on the Shelf

Do you know where chocolate kisses and chocolate chips come from?! I DO!

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Advent Calendar Book

Mommy and Daddy went to run errands without me…I have a sneaking suspicion they went to dinner without me 🙁  I begged Miss Hayley to give me the rest of the books, but she said, “No, way, Jose.”  I don’t know who Jose is, but apparently he’s not allowed to do fun stuff either.  So Mommy gave me the book as soon as she got home.  I had it unwrapped in .3 seconds.  I think I’ll go for a Guinness World Record soon. SNOWMEN!

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Family Photo FAIL

Maybe if I shove the whole cookie in real slow they won’t notice…

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Countdown to Christmas: Day 16

Elf  on the Shelf

Klaus brought all the stuff we needed to make cookies!

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Here’s my recipe:

1. Have Mommy and Daddy bake the cookie dough and cut out the shapes while you’re napping.  This is the not so fun part.

2. Hoard all the sprinkle jars.

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3. Lightly shake the jar over the cookies.

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4. Use grubby fingers to push the sprinkles in.

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5. Pour, squish, rub, repeat until baby germs baby love is on every sprinkle, or until you run out of sprinkles.

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6. Demand Ask nicely for more sprinkles.

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7. Be sure to ask for the bouncing sprinkles.  Those are so fun and magically end up all over the house in a matter of minutes.

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8. Place 3-7 sprinkles on a cookie for your Mommy (or other special person in your life).

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9. Put on your super-safety glove and wait by the oven until they’re all done.  Apparently it takes like 7 hours to cook.  Ignore promises of “just 1 more minute” and warnings of “too hot”.

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Advent Calendar Book

It’ a book about me!  And it’s got Grandma!  And Kitty!  And all the people who were special to me this year.   Mommy made it for me.  You can see it here. (Yes, there’s a typo.  This was in the heart of our sleep deprivation days–I forgive Mommy…this time.)

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Family Photo FAIL

And……..my personal favorite. POOP!

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Countdown to Christmas: Day 15

Elf on the Shelf

I think Elf is getting home-sick again.  He was playing North Pole.

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Advent Calendar Book

Haha, oh it’s Santa. The only man who can get away with with calling every one “Ho, ho, ho!”  You’re so pimp, Santa.

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Family Photo FAIL

Why do you keep glaring at me, Dad?  Is this some sort of reverse Oedipus complex.  Are you jealous of me and Mommy’s relationship? Should I sleep with one eye open?  Do we need to do some male bonding together?  We could go eat beef jerky, shoot stuff, and knock back a couple of beers–I hear that’s the ultimate male bonding experience.  Or maybe we could just go to Chuck-E-Cheese?  I bet playing Whack-a-Mole would totally relieve your frustrations.

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